Not Left Wing Crazy

I really like Jon Stewart's closing speech in the Rally to Restore Sanity and or Fear. (love the jokes) I promise you it's not left wing crazy. I bet you'll nod your head reading it.

“I can’t control what people think this was. I can only tell you my intentions. This was not a rally to ridicule people of faith or people of activism or to look down our noses at the heartland or passionate argument or to suggest that times are not difficult and that we have nothing to fear. They are and we do. But we live now in hard times, not end times. And we can have animus and not be enemies.

But unfortunately one of our main tools in delineating the two broke. The country’s 24 hour political pundit perpetual panic conflictinator did not cause our problems but its existence makes solving them that much harder. The press can hold its magnifying up to our problems bringing them into focus, illuminating issues heretofore unseen or they can use that magnifying glass to light ants on fire and then perhaps host a week of shows on the sudden, unexpected dangerous flaming ant epidemic.

If we amplify everything we hear nothing. There are terrorists and racists and Stalinists and theocrats but those are titles that must be earned. You must have the resume. Not being able to distinguish between real racists and Tea Partiers or real bigots and Juan Williams and Rick Sanchez is an insult, not only to those people but to the racists themselves who have put in the exhausting effort it takes to hate--just as the inability to distinguish terrorists from Muslims makes us less safe not more. The press is our immune system. If we overreact to everything we actually get sicker--and perhaps eczema.

And yet, with that being said, I feel good—strangely, calmly good. Because the image of Americans that is reflected back to us by our political and media process is false. It is us through a fun house mirror, and not the good kind that makes you look slim in the waist and maybe taller, but the kind where you have a giant forehead and an ass shaped like a month old pumpkin and one eyeball.

So, why would we work together? Why would you reach across the aisle to a pumpkin assed forehead eyeball monster? If the picture of us were true, of course, our inability to solve problems would actually be quite sane and reasonable. Why would you work with Marxists actively subverting our Constitution or racists and homophobes who see no one’s humanity but their own? We hear every damn day about how fragile our country is—on the brink of catastrophe—torn by polarizing hate and how it’s a shame that we can’t work together to get things done, but the truth is we do. We work together to get things done every damn day!

The only place we don’t is here or on cable TV. But Americans don’t live here or on cable TV. Where we live our values and principles form the foundations that sustains us while we get things done, not the barriers that prevent us from getting things done. Most Americans don’t live their lives solely as Democrats, Republicans, liberals or conservatives. Americans live their lives more as people that are just a little bit late for something they have to do—often something that they do not want to do—but they do it--impossible things every day that are only made possible by the little reasonable compromises that we all make.

Look on the screen. This is where we are. This is who we are. (points to the Jumbotron screen which show traffic merging into a tunnel). These cars—that’s a schoolteacher who probably thinks his taxes are too high. He’s going to work. There’s another car-a woman with two small kids who can’t really think about anything else right now. There’s another car, swinging, I don’t even know if you can see it—the lady’s in the NRA and she loves Oprah. There’s another car—an investment banker, gay, also likes Oprah. Another car’s a Latino carpenter. Another car a fundamentalist vacuum salesman. Atheist obstetrician. Mormon Jay-Z fan. But this is us. Every one of the cars that you see is filled with individuals of strong belief and principles they hold dear—often principles and beliefs in direct opposition to their fellow travelers.

And yet these millions of cars must somehow find a way to squeeze one by one into a mile long 30 foot wide tunnel carved underneath a mighty river. Carved, by the way, by people who I’m sure had their differences. And they do it. Concession by conscession. You go. Then I’ll go. You go. Then I’ll go. You go then I’ll go. Oh my God, is that an NRA sticker on your car? Is that an Obama sticker on your car? Well, that’s okay—you go and then I’ll go.

And sure, at some point there will be a selfish jerk who zips up the shoulder and cuts in at the last minute, but that individual is rare and he is scorned and not hired as an analyst.

Because we know instinctively as a people that if we are to get through the darkness and back into the light we have to work together. And the truth is, there will always be darkness. And sometimes the light at the end of the tunnel isn’t the promised land. Sometimes it’s just New Jersey. But we do it anyway, together.

If you want to know why I’m here and want I want from you, I can only assure you this: you have already given it to me. Your presence was what I wanted.

Sanity will always be and has always been in the eye of the beholder. To see you here today and the kind of people that you are has restored mine. Thank you."

Fun Baby Story

When E really really likes something (usually involving electronics* but not always), he holds or presses it until his fingers turn white. His little legs stick poker straight out from his body, and he vibrates. He also affects the phone stalker breathing and pouts his lips out kind of duck like. We call it the "interested face." The really funny thing is if the electronic is turned off, he realizes that what he's doing isn't having an effect and loses some of the interest. He's found functions on our remote we didn't know existed and changed all kinds of settings on the computer.

Babies are so funny... and weird as Jen says; even when they play with their loveys and kick crib slats in an effort to evade sleep.

*Water is often figured.

Baby Help

E has decided that now he doesn't want to go to sleep at night. It seems to be a "Noooooo! I want to plaaaaaaaaaay with you!" thing. He cries and cries like his heart's breaking. He won't even take his nighttime bottle well unless I sing him The Elephant Song, we think because it's a precursor to bed time. That Elephant Song calms him instantly though. We've taken to playing it for him on a loop as he falls asleep at night. Is that a normal thing? Both the not wanting to sleep and the having one song that calms instantly?

Letters to Babybutt

Dear E,

The reality of you is so much more wonderful than the daydreams.

Love,
Mama
p.s. Thanks for wanting to sit in my lap, lay your head on my arm and give me so much love and kisses. Of course you give the baby in the mirror much longer, more tonguey kisses, but that's ok. He is quite handsome. I understand.

Random Thoughts

• It seems that what people say about it seeming like therapists aren't really doing much during a session is true. But it's also true that you seem to get better in spite of it. That must just be how it works!
• Florida fall and winter are beautiful.
• The baby loves being naked. He particularly loves being naked outside. We won't discuss why I know that.
• My hair is still coming back!
  

On The Crazy

Pre-Note: Yahoo has been randomly eating my comment emails (and other newsletters etc that I've been receiving for years) again. So I'm just now getting to them. What a wonderful big present for me though to find them all in my spam folder!

On to the real post:

The biggest things I seem to be learning from therapy and my work experiences are that:
1. I am not as crazy as I think I am
and
2. I am my own worst enemy and critic

So far my friends, FavoriteOB and now my therapist have pretty much told me that I don't seem to be that badly off emotionally and that it doesn't show as much as I thought it did. While some of that is probably that I do hide the most awful feelings fairly well, at this point I also have to concede that maybe they're on to something... especially since the professionals are involved.

I am quite the perfectionist and always have been. I'm particularly hard on myself if I'm not meeting my own expectations behaviorally, and I'm not getting validation from other people. It's a big failing. I often grab self esteem from my relationships instead of from my own sense of self worth. So when I see myself as failing emotionally, that begins a vicious spiral where I become more and more visibly agitated, tired, stressed and solemn. That spiral leads to others noticing my distress and interpreting it in their own ways. They then start providing less of the validation I crave. As my therapist says, "You are allowing them to define who you are when you retreat, because you aren't defining it for yourself to them." That spiral then becomes a circle of crap that just gets worse and worse until sometimes the only way to get out of it is to run away.

I need to stop the madness (trite I know). And as much as I need Hub, I need to stop scaring him with those feelings because since he's so close to me, I think he thinks I'm crazier than I am too. Then we feed on each other again. Note though Hub that it's sooo much better when you are as wonderfully supportive as you've been! That doesn't mean you need to stop! hehe.

So that's where I am now - trying to take things less personally, trying to ease up on myself, trying to stop the vicious cycle. If any of you out there have done this and have some pointers, fire away. And baby is now awake from nap, so self reflection time is over. They do tend to make us take ourselves far less seriously eh?

What's Your Sign?

Astrology is interesting to me. I don't really believe in it per se. However, it's so funny that often people seem to match what their sign descriptions say. Is that just because of clever wording? Or is there really something to it? Does your sign seem to match your personality for the most part? Please share. I also invite you to read this Libra description from Astrology Online and tell me if you think I might match it. Obviously it's easier if you know me in person, but feel free to say even if you don't. I will say that I am most definitely not and never have been promiscuous nor indulgent with money, nor do I despise "coarse work." In fact, I love it. Hub is a Libra though and does fit the last two a little bit.

Libra is the only inanimate sign of the zodiac, all the others representing either humans or animals. Many modern astrologers regard it as the most desirable of zodiacal types because it represents the zenith of the year, the high point of the seasons, when the harvest of all the hard work of the spring is reaped. There is a mellowness and sense of relaxation in the air as mankind enjoys the last of the summer sun and the fruits of his toil. Librans too are among the most civilized of the twelve zodiacal characters and are often good looking. They have elegance, charm and good taste, are naturally kind, very gentle, and lovers of beauty, harmony (both in music and social living) and the pleasures that these bring.

They have good critical faculty and are able to stand back and look impartially at matters which call for an impartial judgment to be made on them. But they do not tolerate argument from anyone who challenges their opinions, for once they have reached a conclusion, its truth seems to them self-evident; and among their faults is an impatience of criticism and a greed for approval. But their characters are on the whole balanced, diplomatic and even tempered.

Librans are sensitive to the needs of others and have the gift, sometimes to an almost psychic extent, of understanding the emotional needs of their companions and meeting them with their own innate optimism - they are the kind of people of whom it is said, "They always make you feel better for having been with them." They are very social human beings. They loathe cruelty, viciousness and vulgarity and detest conflict between people, so they do their best to cooperate and compromise with everyone around them, and their ideal for their own circle and for society as a whole is unity.

Their cast of mind is artistic rather than intellectual, though they are usually too moderate and well balanced to be avant garde in any artistic endeavor. They have good perception and observation and their critical ability, with which they are able to view their own efforts as well as those of others, gives their work integrity.

In their personal relationships they show understanding of the other person's point of view, trying to resolve any differences by compromise, and are often willing to allow claims against themselves to be settled to their own disadvantage rather than spoil a relationship. They like the opposite sex to the extent of promiscuity sometimes, and may indulge in romanticism bordering on sentimentality.

Their marriages, however, stand a good chance of success because they are frequently the union of "true minds". The Libran's continuing kindness toward his or her partner mollifies any hurt the latter may feel if the two have had a tiff. Nor can the Libran's spouse often complain that he or she is not understood, for the Libran is usually the most empathetic of all the zodiacal types and the most ready to tolerate the beloved's failings.

The negative Libran character may show frivolity, flirtatiousness and shallowness. It can be changeable and indecisive, impatient of routine, colorlessly conventional and timid, easygoing to the point of inertia, seldom angry when circumstances demand a show of annoyance at least; and yet Librans can shock everyone around them with sudden storms of rage. Their love of pleasure may lead them into extravagance; Libran men can degenerate into reckless gamblers, and Libran women extravagant, jealous and careless about money sometimes squander their wealth and talents in their overenthusiasm for causes which they espouse. Both sexes can become great gossipers. A characteristic of the type is an insatiable curiosity that tempts them to enquire into every social scandal in their circle.

In their work the description "lazy Libra" which is sometimes given is actually more alliterative than true. Librans can be surprisingly energetic, though it is true that they dislike coarse, dirty work. Although some are modestly content, others are extremely ambitious. With their dislike of extremes they make good diplomats but perhaps poor party politicians, for they are moderate in their opinions and able to see other points of view.

It continues

Great. Now the yeast infection (?) area between his little buns is bleeding. Dr. Appt tomorrow at 9am. Advice welcomed.

Poor Baby

Poor E's bum is peeling just as if he had a sunburn except it's from that diaper burn he had a few days ago. Ugh. Poor baby. Diaper burn is the exact way to put it. That's no rash.

Full Circle

This is E's high chair. At first glance, it's just a plain, aging high chair with a cute pad.


And it has been used... extensively. My Grandma used it for my Mom and various other family members. My Great Aunt used it for some of her children. Mom got it back when I was born and used it for me, my sister and some of my cousins. Then my sister used it for her boys. Toward the end of my pregnancy, I started asking Mom about it. I remembered it fondly, and it's made of actual wood! She expressed doubts that it would be ok and didn't want to bring it down... but then she did.


When Mom got it for me, she refinished it and decorated it with some pretty designs. The back (under the pad) has a cute little lion on it. She's crafty, my Mom. The little touches she added make me feel loved.


It's imperfect, but I love having it for E. Why is it that family furniture garners so many memories? Is it because it lasts so long and sees so much (the good stuff anyway)? I know this piece has. It was lovingly touched by my sweet Grandma's hands. It held my cousin who was dogged by sickness and passed away very young. It holds memories of my sister; memories like the times she was so sleepy her head fell into her food at dinner. Its wood holds warmth. It's a pleasure to touch. The tray catches on the runners, but to me it's a funny quirk. Some of the finish is rubbing off, but to me that adds character. It now holds my sweet baby's chunk legs, and to me, it's a full circle of love.

Diaper Burn

I know some people may think Pampers is getting a bad rap. I know some people think Moms may be overreacting to the whole Dry Max debacle. However, we had confirmation today that that stuff hurts E - badly. We wondered what the regulars would do since the sensitive ones just gave him some red welts. Now we know.

E's daycare provider put a non sensitive Pampers diaper on him for some unknown reason. He had plenty of Huggies Pure and Natural in his bag. (Remind me to call Huggies and send them some love.) Anyway, she mentioned that he had gotten a diaper rash from his somewhat looser stool today. He went there with no diaper rash despite having had pretty much liquid stool with us through the weekend. I didn't take him home and change him right away because we had to stop at the grocery store. When we got him here, we noticed the odd diaper. It was a Pampers one. When I took it off, his poor bum looked like this:


This photo is just his LEG. It's the minor part of the rash. It was also taken after we had already treated the rash/burn, let him air out and then put on one of his good diapers for a while. It was much worse. It's astonishing how just taking off that diaper helped him heal. The worst parts of it were where his skin had actually peeled up. He looked literally like a chemical burn patient. His skin was also crimson and irritated the whole way up his belly and down his legs where the diaper had touched. He couldn't bear to lie on his back because it hurt. This happened after one (maybe more?) Dry Max diaper to a baby who has never had a rash like this in his life and who did not have a rash when we last saw him. I really really wish Pampers would take this seriously. I realize E is probably more sensitive, but it seems to be happening to lots of babies. And even if it's not causing this kind of damage to each child, chemicals that do this can NOT be good for a baby period (or anyone else for that matter.)

Sorry for the rant. I'm just a wee bit frustrated. My poor teething (teeth showing!!!) baby didn't need this on top of it. He was up every single hour last night.

My Issue

My issue is apparently generalized anxiety disorder. I haven't been back to the therapist in a few weeks because it's so hard to ask people to watch the baby. I feel like I had no idea what I was getting into with having him so far from most family or friends with children and both of us working full time. I really feel like I could get better more easily if I could just focus on this aspect of my life right now. Although to be fair, I didn't expect that my family down here would move 1000 miles away right after he was born.

This stuff is tough. I bought a book my therapist recommended and am going to try to work through it. I may post some things here to help me work it out just as we did with Unsung Lullabies. That helped me a lot, and I'm hoping it will help me this time as well. I have to admit that sometimes it feels like I'm climbing out of a slippery, crumbly hole bit by bit. It is getting better, but with lots of fall backs, and it's taking lots of time and very hard work. It's so difficult to get better when the very fact that I'm having issues and have had them for so long makes me feel guilty for being a "bad friend," and the negative self talk is such a vicious cycle.

Fifty Percent

I keep reading that 50% of all babies and toddlers fall into the "easy" category. No wonder there is so much assvice, judgment and self congratulation out there about raising babies. One must feel pretty smug if he or she lands an "easy" (Yes note the quotations on purpose. None of them are really all THAT easy.) baby. In everything I read, E falls squarely into the "shy" or "slow to warm up" category, though the older he gets, the more "easy" traits he seems to acquire. His temperament endears him to me. We match each other. We "get" one another.

Shout out to all the dedicated Mommies and Daddies raising some of the more tricky babies: We're doing all right! Our children are who they are, and we make the most of it!

p.s. Have I mentioned that I love Harvey Karp?
p.p.s. That "Babies" documentary is ADORABLE and heart warming. I particularly loved the African family. That's more how I would like to raise E - with him all the time, letting him play outside constantly, etc.

Happy Thanksgiving to all our lovely Canadian friends!

The Creepy Next Door

So you remember the creepy old neighbor next door? I would link to my stories about him, but I can't seem to find them and don't have the time for a long search. Anyway, if you do, you'll remember that he seems to kind of... come on.. to me. OK, so kissing me on the side of the neck is more than a come on, it's straight up freaky, but I don't get close enough to him anymore for that to happen.

He seemed to calm down during the latter half of my pregnancy and the beginning of my motherhood experiences. But now that I'm "lookin' good" again, I think he's back in form. Aside from mentioning how "good" I look on a regular basis, he's also been talking a lot about how well fed my baby is. And it's nothing I can really put my finger on, but he just says it in a creepy way. It doesn't help that the first time he said it, his daughter had just asked me about how breast feeding was going (in not so many words) right before that. I get the distinct feeling that he's also been trying to catch me outside alone again. And he gets entirely too close to my baby when he manages to get near him.

Ugh, ugh, UGH. Please save me from oversexed 80 something year old men with seriously ridiculous delusions. *shiver* Oh well. At least I could knock him down and run away fairly easily.

Older but Younger

Happy 33rd Birthday (a few days late) to me! I have to say that though I feel physically decrepit half the time, I actually don't feel as old mentally as I did. I feel more mature, but now I don't feel so old because that advanced maternal age label isn't hanging over my head. You may be thinking, "But what about when you have your second child?" Oh but that probably won't be an issue. More on that particular matter in another post to come.

Overheard

Speaking of a girl who just had an ectopic pregnancy: "That's what she gets for telling everyone about the pregnancy that early!" (Yes - because God punishes you for excitement and not being a deathly terrified infertile.)

"All I'm saying is that when you stop trying so hard, you start to focus on yourself more and take care of yourself better. THAT'S why so many people get pregnant when they stop trying or go to adopt." (This from a woman who had a little trouble due to PCOS for a few months, went on Met and "fell" pregnant the second month on it. Very wise no?)

"Well he's a good color. It's nice that he's not SO dark. He's a nice in between and not too dark skinned."
(My elderly neighbor talking about my half Filipino baby. No words.)

Fun Family Stories

*Tonight E was very excited about his book reading. It was past time for him to eat, so I kept showing him his bottle, but he kept pushing it away impatiently and leaning over the arm of the chair for more books. "NO Mommy. READ more! NO sleep!" Then he'd smile delightedly as he smacked the front of the chosen book. The sleepiness eventually won though.

*E has a few pairs of PJs that have animal faces on the feet. These include doggies and monkeys complete with ears. Since he loves to pull his socks off and play with his feet, these little animals get quite a work out. He recently realized that those cool things stuck to his feet actually had faces. Now we frequently see him hug his own foot while saying, "Aaaawawawawawaaaaaaaaaaaw." (That means I'm loving you doggie face - or whatever he's loving at the moment.) Very cute.

*Hub has been working on an extra project lately and not getting enough sleep. On top of that, he has some nasty allergies that prevent a quality snooze. I often bug him to try to get more rest. The other day we were getting in the car with the baby when I realized that I had forgotten the diaper bag. He said, "I'll get it," and ran back in the house.

The bag was just in the living room already packed, but it took him a few minutes to emerge. He opened the door and tossed a bag in to me. I looked at him blankly, waiting for the punch line before saying,

"I need the diaper bag honey."

"Yeeeeeah," he said, and indicated the bag he had handed me.

"No honey, the diaper bag. I need some of his other things." The bag he had handed me did indeed have a few diapers and a bottle in it, but that was all.

"What?? Do you want a HUGE bag?"

"Um, no, just the diaper bag."

"You want the big backpack thing for daycare???" he asked incredulously.
I stared at him blankly some more, my mind whirring for the right answer.

Finally I said, "Honey, this is NOT the diaper bag."
"Yes it is."
Complete bafflement.
"Um, nooooo. It's my LUNCH bag. My ORANGE lunch bag that you had to actually put baby supplies in to bring out. My lunch bag that has lunch stuff IN it."

He stared at me, perplexed, for a moment.

"Honey, I need the silver, small diaper bag that is always packed."

I finally saw the light dawn in his eyes. Then we laughed with the slightest edge of concern before fixing the problem and going on our way. I'm thinking I probably shouldn't have been OK with him being the driver.

Moral of the story: He figured out that he's sleep deprived, and that I'm not just bugging him for nothing.

No More Milk

E had his last bottle with my milk in it on Tuesday. it had gotten to the point where it was taking me two days to get 3 or 4 ounces, and it just wasn't worth the time anymore. I still use some of my milk for cereal and such sometimes, but he's doing well with the formula. He is so obviously the driver in this plan, that it doesn't really bother me at all. Sometimes I miss the closeness, but he's a lovey bug, so I get it in other ways. He also snuggles pretty well when I feed him his bottle and sometimes wants only me to do it, so it's not so different.

I kind of miss that amazing ability, but to be honest, I feel free in a way too!

9 Month Letter to Babybutt

Dear E,

You are now 9 mos old. (How does it happen??) Three months to go until that big year birthday! I don't know how Mommy's heart can take it. You are even more the light of my life than before. I didn't know it was possible for my love for you to keep growing. It was already so huge that it knocked me for a loop. Sometimes I feel like I'm going to burst with it. I think it's safe to say that Daddy feels the same.

You are still shy and sensitive, but growing more bold with time. When something's too much, you turn your face to my shoulder and grip me hard. That's how we know it's time to back it down. I love that you trust us so much. You rarely cry with us and seem to completely trust that we will fix whatever is wrong. You are ever so patient even when hungry, tired or dirty (which you HATE.) It still takes you some time to warm up to people, but it's not as scary for you. You fix them with "the look" for a few minutes. If they pass the test, that blindingly beautiful smile comes out. Can I just be a biased Mommy for a minute and tell you how many people have complimented you on your beautiful smile and adorable face? I think you'll have the power to be a charmer, but the sensitivity to use it wisely and kindly.

You finally try to crawl and pull yourself up! You've just now decided that it's something you'd like to accomplish. I think you've realized that's the only way you'll ever get those wires from which Mommy and Daddy so meanly hold you back. You're a big fan of opening drawers, but not a fan of peas, black beans or avocado.

Dancing is ever so fun, and you wiggle on your butt or feet when we say, "Dance dance baby!" You do it when music is playing as well. You still hate loud noises like packing tape sounds, but are lovey as ever. Your big new loving thing is to say "aaaaawwww" and pat us on the arm, leg, chest - whatever is handy. You pat me a lot. Daddy always says, "Good Mommy" as if I'm a puppy. It's pretty cute.

And man are you SMART! You really connect with us, try to figure out how things work and understand so many words. You love books even more than you did before and want to read often. You still turn the pages as you did from about 5 months on, but now if I show you 2, 3, 4 or even more books and say, "which one?" you pat the book you want to read. If you don't like the choices, you turn to look over the arm of the rocking chair where a more palatable choice may linger. I love reading to you. Mommy and Daddy love books, so it's pretty cool that you do too.

By the way, everything you see suddenly HAS to be the baby's. It's sometimes challenging to keep you from harm, but you are so very good about it when we turn you away from something. At most you fuss for a few seconds. I really can't complain. I have a wonderful baby.

Daddy is fond of saying that how beautiful you are is such a shock to the eyes after he's been away from you, and it's true. You are physically beautiful, no doubt, but your little soul shines so brightly for us, and the love that we all share is just a gorgeous thing. When that's all combined, it's almost overwhelming for your two humble little parents.

Love you forever and ever and ever,
M

Friday Night Leftovers

• Yeah, so I finally got my butt in gear. What of it?
• Note that I am also way late. Even if I do it, I can't do it right.
  
• We figured out that little man is afraid of the dark. If we have enough light coming into the room, he sleeps (with a few little wake ups where he babbles) from about 7:30 until about 5:30. Then he wants some milk and goes back to sleep until 7 or 8 am. If we don't, he wakes up crying multiple times. Yes, we are spoiled right now. However, please see previous anguished no sleep posts.
  
• We had another baby and his Mama visit last weekend. E was afraid of him. He clutched me and cried if I put him down. He finally got used to it and played some. Then we had fun.
  
• I think it's because it wasn't the lovely Elizabeth or SoBee.
• Jen should not have moved away. (I need to make her feel guilty multiple times a week.)
• I think I may have ovulated. Progesterone does a body good. God it feels good to be ME again.
• My physicality is coming back. So I'm really NOT a lazy sack of potatoes! The last year or so had me convinced that was my default setting.
• Any ideas on cheap/easy baby costumes? E has to enjoy his first Halloween!
• The car broke down completely this week. Luckily we are able to have it fixed. This one is paid off. We did NOT want to have a new car payment.
• Nursing is completely and totally done. E says, "NO Mama!" And it's cool! I still get about 4 oz a day for bottle feeding, and I do it because I'm a cheapskate. Formula is pricey!
• Remind me to tell you a really cute baby story in its own post.
  
• Please see below termite concerns and help a girl out with some info!
  

Termites???

Sooo... a few weeks ago I thought I found a termite. I did not keep said bug, but called Terminix for an inspection. They found nothing, but offered their protection service for $800. We waited because... well.. $800.

This past weekend I found another bug that looked to be a termite (a swarmer.) I called a different company. They came out and saw nothing, but this time I had kept the bug. The man said it had very termite characteristics, but was like no other termite he's ever seen around here. He also said it's the wrong time for swarmers, and that I should have seen 100's or 1000's of them, not 2. He saw nothing alarming around the house at all, but also recommended protection system for $700.

The first company would use Sentricon, the second - Termidor. I know it's probably a matter of time before termites find our house (concrete block, but plenty of wood here and there to keep them busy.) Please - hit me with the advice! From what could be happening termite wise, to whether we treat now or not, to which system to use, to which company is best. Oh, and our car died. No one knows what's wrong with it. Joy.

I know I can count on you internets!