We aren't missing. We just got back from our 7 day cruise! I would have mentioned it except that I heard some stories of people being robbed when others knew that they would be gone from their homes when it was put on the 'net. Yeah, I know. I'm anonymous. You can't blame a girl for being paranoid eh?
And while I was gone.. my embryo became a fetus! AND.. we passed the three month mark!
I loved the ports (Central America and the Caribbean). The ship.. well... let me just give you a rundown of what I learned.
1. Those who say you can't feel the ship moving ever must have rocks in their ears instead of fluid for balancing. That's all I have to say about that.
2. If you have motion sickness issues, you will have issues on the ship at some point.
3. Morning (all day) sickness and motion sickness do not good bedfellows make.
4. I continue to be fascinated by the poorest of third world countries despite my fear of crime there.
5. Motion sickness continues after debarkation.
6. Karaoke is easier to do on a ship where everyone's drunk and your buddy.
7. Though cruising is cool to get a taste of a bunch of different places, Hub and I prefer visiting them in depth.
8. Cruising is way more fun with a bunch of family members.
Sunday, June 28, 2009
Friday, June 19, 2009
Burnt Sienna
I have always loved the crayon color burnt sienna. I just identify with that gorgeous, earthy red-brown. So when those inevitable emails circulate asking, "If you were a crayon, what color would you be?" I always pick that one.
My cousin found that interesting and sent me an article entitled, "Color My World Burnt Sienna." Kinda cool.
My cousin found that interesting and sent me an article entitled, "Color My World Burnt Sienna." Kinda cool.
Time to lose the security blanket
The time is swiftly approaching when I will no longer be able to take the Metformin (glucophage) or the progesterone suppositories. To be quite honest, I won't miss the suppositories at all. I don't think I really needed them all that much in the first place, and they just add to the side effects. The Metformin however, it is my savior. That little... scratch that... horse pill balanced my crazy body. It made everything work more smoothly from my cholesterol stabilizing abilities to my insulin regulation to my ovulation. It helped balance my moods, my fatigue and my life. It helped us achieve the greatest goal we ever set out to achieve.
On top of that - taking Metformin makes a PCOSer like me feel almost normal when pregnant. Statistics show that it reduces your risk of miscarriage to almost that of a regular person! I am so not used to being a regular person! I know, I know - it would probably do more harm than good to keep taking it past the 12 week mark, and that's why they stop it. But I've attached such a superstitious feeling with this drug that it makes everything all better and won't let anything bad happen. It's the equivalent to my little blue blanky with the satin trim that I still have stuffed in my closet - just in case.
But I can deal. I can trust the critter's ability to survive. I can trust my body to do its job with enough panache to deliver me a healthy baby. Sure I can. However, there's also the anxiety about going off this drug that has made me healthy. Of course I'm going to need to go back on it when it's safe to do so. I just never want to live that other unhealthy life again. It seems like a nightmare. So hopefully it won't feel like a nightmare until I can restart it. But you know what else is a nightmare? ADJUSTING TO METFORMIN. And now I'm going to have to do that process all over again - and just when I got salads back! It's enough to make any sane girl swoon. It's definitely all incredibly worth it. But that doesn't mean I'm not going to have nail chewing anxiety over the process. At least the Synthroid will stay. God bless Synthroid.
On top of that - taking Metformin makes a PCOSer like me feel almost normal when pregnant. Statistics show that it reduces your risk of miscarriage to almost that of a regular person! I am so not used to being a regular person! I know, I know - it would probably do more harm than good to keep taking it past the 12 week mark, and that's why they stop it. But I've attached such a superstitious feeling with this drug that it makes everything all better and won't let anything bad happen. It's the equivalent to my little blue blanky with the satin trim that I still have stuffed in my closet - just in case.
But I can deal. I can trust the critter's ability to survive. I can trust my body to do its job with enough panache to deliver me a healthy baby. Sure I can. However, there's also the anxiety about going off this drug that has made me healthy. Of course I'm going to need to go back on it when it's safe to do so. I just never want to live that other unhealthy life again. It seems like a nightmare. So hopefully it won't feel like a nightmare until I can restart it. But you know what else is a nightmare? ADJUSTING TO METFORMIN. And now I'm going to have to do that process all over again - and just when I got salads back! It's enough to make any sane girl swoon. It's definitely all incredibly worth it. But that doesn't mean I'm not going to have nail chewing anxiety over the process. At least the Synthroid will stay. God bless Synthroid.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Generosity
I may complain about unwanted comments, but I'm not even out of the first trimester (though close!) and people have been so generous already! A dear friend offered the use of her bassinett. Another dear friend already gave us a gift. My Mom sent me some maternity shorts. My sister is sending me hand-me-down clothes. And last night, Hub brought home an almost new looking, very nice car seat with base. For free. From one of his coworkers just for us to use. Wow. That is so incredibly helpful I can't even tell you. I'm blown away.
In other news, this heat is kicking my ass. Yeah, yeah.. Florida is usually hot. But I'm usually not so bad with it. Right now, with the nausea, it makes me want to vomit all the more and then curl up in a ball to sleep. Thank God I'm going on vacation soon.
P.S. I've decided to keep my old boy shorts and use both those (even though they don't match.. you can't see them anyway) and my skirt. I'm already bigger than I was when I tried that on, which is a little scary. Thanks for the input!
In other news, this heat is kicking my ass. Yeah, yeah.. Florida is usually hot. But I'm usually not so bad with it. Right now, with the nausea, it makes me want to vomit all the more and then curl up in a ball to sleep. Thank God I'm going on vacation soon.
P.S. I've decided to keep my old boy shorts and use both those (even though they don't match.. you can't see them anyway) and my skirt. I'm already bigger than I was when I tried that on, which is a little scary. Thanks for the input!
Friday, June 12, 2009
Your votes desperately needed!
Remember the suit I mentioned? I tried buying a normal little tankini - plain and unadorned. I imagined it stretching over my little belly all cute and sporty like - except that that didn't happen. The few "normal little" tankinis they had just did not fit the bazoombas or didn't look very good. That's how I ended up with a maternity suit. I'm pretty ok with it except that I had to get a large to fit the aforementioned bazoombas. This means that it falls a little lower on my legs than it's supposed to. Thus I got the skirt bottoms because I felt it balanced it out better and did not accentuate the thighage. (Can you believe Blogger did not spell check "thighage??")
Anyway, when I got it home, I expressed to Hub my worry that I looked like either an older lady or a little kid with my little skirt bottoms and flowy top. He thought it was too ruffly and suggested I try the boy short bottoms. They had none in my size at Target, which is another reason I went with the skirt. So I tried on a blue pair of boy shorts I had just for comparison. For some reason it just looks wrong to me. Plus, the top covers the bottoms almost completely in that case. But I still can't shake the feeling that I look silly in the skirt even though it goes better with the top. The third option - regular bottoms - is just a no go to me because of how very little they show beneath the top. It just looks ridiculous. So I'm leaving it up to you my friends!! View the photos below, then vote on the sidebar and/or leave a comment as to what you would do in my situation. You know I'm desperate when I post bathing suit photos of myself for all to see. Ugh.
The one on the left is the shorts. The one on the right is the skirt.
P.S. Remember that I need this for about 5 and 6 mos pregnant at the beach as well.
Anyway, when I got it home, I expressed to Hub my worry that I looked like either an older lady or a little kid with my little skirt bottoms and flowy top. He thought it was too ruffly and suggested I try the boy short bottoms. They had none in my size at Target, which is another reason I went with the skirt. So I tried on a blue pair of boy shorts I had just for comparison. For some reason it just looks wrong to me. Plus, the top covers the bottoms almost completely in that case. But I still can't shake the feeling that I look silly in the skirt even though it goes better with the top. The third option - regular bottoms - is just a no go to me because of how very little they show beneath the top. It just looks ridiculous. So I'm leaving it up to you my friends!! View the photos below, then vote on the sidebar and/or leave a comment as to what you would do in my situation. You know I'm desperate when I post bathing suit photos of myself for all to see. Ugh.
The one on the left is the shorts. The one on the right is the skirt.
P.S. Remember that I need this for about 5 and 6 mos pregnant at the beach as well.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Everything's Going to be All Right...
Finish that line and earn my undying respect. Thanks Barenaked Ladies for giving me irreverent songs that can match just about any mood or moment. (If you want to cheat, click here.)
I had already planned on getting new clothes for this cruise I'm heading for in a few weeks. I have a few nice items that I bought for my sister-in-law's wedding, but that was back in 2005. Yes, it's been 4 years since I bought any new clothes of any significance. I usually just buy necessities like socks and underwear if I feel forced. Don't get me wrong. I love clothes shopping if I have a goal in mind (I hate power shopping with no goal.. HATE it). But money always dictates caution, and it sometimes depressed me how very stingy I had to be. This cruise and Hub's raise were just what I needed to get me into some nicer clothing! Usually I subsist on his and my sister's hand me downs.
Thank goodness I didn't go before this though. Not much of my old clothing fits very well anymore. Between the enormous knockers, the beer gut and the ever thickening waist line and thighs*, things just don't look or feel (or really even fit at all) like they used to. Not that I'm not delighted by these changes (as is Hub - see above knocker mention). It's just that it does make things a bit tricky while you balance getting things that fit now with not spending a lot of money because you'll need even bigger things later.
All this lead up is just to say that I think I finished buying what I want for the cruise today. When I went shopping with Jen and the lovely Elizabeth, I bought desperately needed bras that wouldn't hurt my poor, swollen, reddened girls. I had also bought a few larger, longer shirts and the most adorable dress on clearance at the Gap. Don't believe me that Gap has great maternity clothes? Check out these cute things! My dress isn't on there, but it's a long sundress with dark orange flowers on it. I love it. it was definitely an extravagance for me.
Today, I rounded out the bras and think I may finally have enough to get me through a few more months. It's hard when it's all hot, sweaty weather outside. You go through them quickly. Then I headed for the always dreaded.... bathing suits. aaaargh. Bathing suit shopping is difficult and expensive enough when you are looking your slimmest. Why is it that so many manufacturers think that if you are rounded in any area that you would perhaps enjoy lots of ruffles to exentuate it??? OK, I understand. They're trying to "hide" it. However, don't you think a nice slimming line would be less conspicuous than a giant bow or flaring ruffled accents that just draw attention to the bulk? Perhaps that costs too much money. It's easy to slap some flare on there.
So I ended up spending a little more than I wanted, but finally happy that I looked stylish instead of garish. God bless Target and their Liz Lange line. If you look, I got the purple "Ikat" tankini. It's very cute, but I'm feeling a little self conscious about buying maternity stuff so soon. I'll be a little over 3 months along when I wear it, but we're going to the beach again in August, and I'll need it. Will people think I'm a freak for wearing a maternity suit at this point? I tried buying a regular one - believe me, they were cheaper, but they just looked so bad.
All this angst, and I'm ridiculously happy to have it. Even though I worry, it's so much fun to shop for this changing body. I really am ok with how it looks until the doctor winds me up.
*Please note that I am petite with approximately 2 inches of waist. I'm taking that to mean I will "pop out" earlier and more severely. Either that or that 4 pound weight gain is really doing me in just as the doctor worried it would. Hello sarcasm my friend. How I love you.
I had already planned on getting new clothes for this cruise I'm heading for in a few weeks. I have a few nice items that I bought for my sister-in-law's wedding, but that was back in 2005. Yes, it's been 4 years since I bought any new clothes of any significance. I usually just buy necessities like socks and underwear if I feel forced. Don't get me wrong. I love clothes shopping if I have a goal in mind (I hate power shopping with no goal.. HATE it). But money always dictates caution, and it sometimes depressed me how very stingy I had to be. This cruise and Hub's raise were just what I needed to get me into some nicer clothing! Usually I subsist on his and my sister's hand me downs.
Thank goodness I didn't go before this though. Not much of my old clothing fits very well anymore. Between the enormous knockers, the beer gut and the ever thickening waist line and thighs*, things just don't look or feel (or really even fit at all) like they used to. Not that I'm not delighted by these changes (as is Hub - see above knocker mention). It's just that it does make things a bit tricky while you balance getting things that fit now with not spending a lot of money because you'll need even bigger things later.
All this lead up is just to say that I think I finished buying what I want for the cruise today. When I went shopping with Jen and the lovely Elizabeth, I bought desperately needed bras that wouldn't hurt my poor, swollen, reddened girls. I had also bought a few larger, longer shirts and the most adorable dress on clearance at the Gap. Don't believe me that Gap has great maternity clothes? Check out these cute things! My dress isn't on there, but it's a long sundress with dark orange flowers on it. I love it. it was definitely an extravagance for me.
Today, I rounded out the bras and think I may finally have enough to get me through a few more months. It's hard when it's all hot, sweaty weather outside. You go through them quickly. Then I headed for the always dreaded.... bathing suits. aaaargh. Bathing suit shopping is difficult and expensive enough when you are looking your slimmest. Why is it that so many manufacturers think that if you are rounded in any area that you would perhaps enjoy lots of ruffles to exentuate it??? OK, I understand. They're trying to "hide" it. However, don't you think a nice slimming line would be less conspicuous than a giant bow or flaring ruffled accents that just draw attention to the bulk? Perhaps that costs too much money. It's easy to slap some flare on there.
So I ended up spending a little more than I wanted, but finally happy that I looked stylish instead of garish. God bless Target and their Liz Lange line. If you look, I got the purple "Ikat" tankini. It's very cute, but I'm feeling a little self conscious about buying maternity stuff so soon. I'll be a little over 3 months along when I wear it, but we're going to the beach again in August, and I'll need it. Will people think I'm a freak for wearing a maternity suit at this point? I tried buying a regular one - believe me, they were cheaper, but they just looked so bad.
All this angst, and I'm ridiculously happy to have it. Even though I worry, it's so much fun to shop for this changing body. I really am ok with how it looks until the doctor winds me up.
*Please note that I am petite with approximately 2 inches of waist. I'm taking that to mean I will "pop out" earlier and more severely. Either that or that 4 pound weight gain is really doing me in just as the doctor worried it would. Hello sarcasm my friend. How I love you.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
I'd Kinda Like a Tail
Very glad. The seahorse is now officially a fetus. No more tail! Water is currently one of the culprits making me feel ill. Mind you that I often work outside - in Florida - in June. Oh well, zero calorie, caffeine-free soda it is. (yes, juice and milk are equally bad offenders)
However, today I felt like myself a lot of the day - not too sick. I'm very hesitant to even send that out into the ether. Now I know I shall pay.
However, today I felt like myself a lot of the day - not too sick. I'm very hesitant to even send that out into the ether. Now I know I shall pay.
Sunday, June 7, 2009
Attention Span Challenged
Oh my goodness you guys crack me up. Jen calling Jillian a he? Priceless. All of you who loved playing the games I loved? (Farah included) You are of course, in wonderful taste and quite fun. ;-) Jamie wanting to be Princess Di? You were far more well informed than I at that age my dear. I don't think my Mom thought much of royalty though, so that may be why I wasn't. Ah Kristin. People actually insisted I was a boy to my Mother and Grandparents even when I was dressed as a girl because, "Look at those shoulders! That's ALL BOY!" (at least as I heard it later) And like Cali, I do believe I will be a no guns lady as well. He/she can use sticks as guns if he or she likes, but no real looking ones until maybe much later. And you are welcome MAK. Glad to be of assistance. :) I actually liked dolls and boy stuff. I was an only child for a long time, so adapted easily to whatever play my playmate wanted. I forgot about marbles! LOVED them. We used to trade them at school. I believe Jacks were my absolute favorite though. I could still play that game for hours. I wish I had some! Now I know what I want to ask Santa to put in my stocking this year. THANKS!
In another completely unrelated side note... A WARNING TO ALL HORMONAL WOMEN OF ANY SORT: If you go to see "Up," bring a BOX OF TISSUES! I saw it yesterday. What a wonderful, wonderful movie. We saw it in 3-D. It was really cool, but at the same time, the color wasn't as true because of that glasses. But that's ok. We'll buy it the minute it comes out and be able to see the color beautifully for years.
In another completely unrelated side note... A WARNING TO ALL HORMONAL WOMEN OF ANY SORT: If you go to see "Up," bring a BOX OF TISSUES! I saw it yesterday. What a wonderful, wonderful movie. We saw it in 3-D. It was really cool, but at the same time, the color wasn't as true because of that glasses. But that's ok. We'll buy it the minute it comes out and be able to see the color beautifully for years.
Saturday, June 6, 2009
Combining Memes
I often forget to do Memes - or I get so involved in my ramblings that I don't find the time. But MAK-now made such a good case for hers that I had to get on it. ;) I was tagged for the 8's one too and really liked one of the questions, so I'm combining themes here. And as usual - if you wanna do it, please feel free.
Lucky 7's (with a Crazy 8 thrown in)
7 All-time Favorite books:
1. Killer Angels
2. Ender's Game
3. Any of Little House on the Prairie
4. Seabiscuit
5. The Velveteen Rabbit
6. In a Sunburned Country
7. The Red Badge of Courage
(These are all very subject to change without notice)
7 All-time Favorite movies:
1. Toy Story
2. The Matrix (FIRST one)
3. Lord of the Rings (first one but like 3 a lot as well)
4. The Sixth Sense
5. The Truman Show
6. Fifth Element
7. When Harry Met Sally/Love Actually (tie)
(again - subject to change :)
7 Things you must have on your person at all times:
1. wallet
2. cell phone
3. chapstick
4. ponytail holder
5. wedding ring
6. snacks
7. metformin
7 Things that make you happy:
1. Hubby (agree - the biggest one :)
2. great restaurants - or I could just say GREAT FOOD
3. Reading
4. TRAVEL!
5. A beautiful sky
6. Real stories of love
7. My furbabies
(and so many more)
7 Words that best describe you:
1. introspective
2. intelligent
3. happy
4. dreamer
5. affectionate
6. driven
7. honest
7 Jobs you wish you could have:
1. award-winning novelist (here here!)
2. wildlife researcher (if the logistics meant I could actually HAVE a home)
And otherwise, I'm pretty happy with what I am. :)
7 All-time Favorite TV shows:
1. Friends
2. The Cosby Show
3. Little House on the Prairie
4. The Amazing Race
5. The Office
6. House Hunters (except we currently are sans cable)
7. Almost anything on the travel channel - aaaaaah travel
7 Favorite baby names (male or female ok):
1. I love a lot of MAK's choices, but now that I'm faced with possibly USING a name? I don't know what my favorites are anymore. I tend to prefer Irish and Russian sounding names.
7 Websites you check out every day, no matter what:
(there are none I check every day, but we'll go with what I check most. :)
1. yahoo mail
2. my blog (as a bounce off point to see others')
3. twitter (for a few people)
4. igoogle
5. The Pioneer Woman
6. A message board I'm on
7. Amazon
7 places I have lived (My nod to Crazy 8's - modified)
1. Plattsburgh, NY
2. Central PA (various places)
3. Northern VA
4. Glen Rose, TX (very short time)
5. Utica, NY
6. Buffalo area, NY
7. Central FL (various places)
Lucky 7's (with a Crazy 8 thrown in)
7 All-time Favorite books:
1. Killer Angels
2. Ender's Game
3. Any of Little House on the Prairie
4. Seabiscuit
5. The Velveteen Rabbit
6. In a Sunburned Country
7. The Red Badge of Courage
(These are all very subject to change without notice)
7 All-time Favorite movies:
1. Toy Story
2. The Matrix (FIRST one)
3. Lord of the Rings (first one but like 3 a lot as well)
4. The Sixth Sense
5. The Truman Show
6. Fifth Element
7. When Harry Met Sally/Love Actually (tie)
(again - subject to change :)
7 Things you must have on your person at all times:
1. wallet
2. cell phone
3. chapstick
4. ponytail holder
5. wedding ring
6. snacks
7. metformin
7 Things that make you happy:
1. Hubby (agree - the biggest one :)
2. great restaurants - or I could just say GREAT FOOD
3. Reading
4. TRAVEL!
5. A beautiful sky
6. Real stories of love
7. My furbabies
(and so many more)
7 Words that best describe you:
1. introspective
2. intelligent
3. happy
4. dreamer
5. affectionate
6. driven
7. honest
7 Jobs you wish you could have:
1. award-winning novelist (here here!)
2. wildlife researcher (if the logistics meant I could actually HAVE a home)
And otherwise, I'm pretty happy with what I am. :)
7 All-time Favorite TV shows:
1. Friends
2. The Cosby Show
3. Little House on the Prairie
4. The Amazing Race
5. The Office
6. House Hunters (except we currently are sans cable)
7. Almost anything on the travel channel - aaaaaah travel
7 Favorite baby names (male or female ok):
1. I love a lot of MAK's choices, but now that I'm faced with possibly USING a name? I don't know what my favorites are anymore. I tend to prefer Irish and Russian sounding names.
7 Websites you check out every day, no matter what:
(there are none I check every day, but we'll go with what I check most. :)
1. yahoo mail
2. my blog (as a bounce off point to see others')
3. twitter (for a few people)
4. igoogle
5. The Pioneer Woman
6. A message board I'm on
7. Amazon
7 places I have lived (My nod to Crazy 8's - modified)
1. Plattsburgh, NY
2. Central PA (various places)
3. Northern VA
4. Glen Rose, TX (very short time)
5. Utica, NY
6. Buffalo area, NY
7. Central FL (various places)
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Ah, Gender
People often ask why I'm concerned about others knowing what sex the baby is. In short, I'm concerned about intense perpetuation of gender roles. Though Jen assures me that if you repeatedly ask for variety and not just pink or trucker's outfits, you shall receive.
This interesting blogger and mother put it pretty nicely. Living in Florida, I see a LOT of the whole princess/fairy thing, and quite frankly, I get very excited to see a little girl dressed up as something other. But I can admit that princess play figured a lot into my childhood. It just was not in any way a central sort of obsessive theme. I also role played as a jockey (with my stick horse), war (yes, we should grimace here), cops and robbers, store (I still find cash registers fun and enjoy being a cashier off and on!), school, super heroes, house, and one of my favorites - SPY.
This interesting blogger and mother put it pretty nicely. Living in Florida, I see a LOT of the whole princess/fairy thing, and quite frankly, I get very excited to see a little girl dressed up as something other. But I can admit that princess play figured a lot into my childhood. It just was not in any way a central sort of obsessive theme. I also role played as a jockey (with my stick horse), war (yes, we should grimace here), cops and robbers, store (I still find cash registers fun and enjoy being a cashier off and on!), school, super heroes, house, and one of my favorites - SPY.
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Status Update and Crazy Vignettes
First off, the living room area is finally painted! 
Here you can see (if you can on a computer) the lovely green we chose. Special thanks to the kind writer of We Are What We Repeatedly Do. Now we just have to finish painting the dining area... and the hallway... and the extra (baby's?) room.... sigh.
Secondly, I had my first physical exam today. My girls are up a full cup size (and they ain't tiny to begin with) and my gut is bloated. In fact, dear Jen & Elizabeth advised me on a shopping trip (at which we had the best sandwiches ever made for her birthday) on buying new bras that are heaven. She also oohed with me over the cutest little maternity sundress ever that I shall wear on my upcoming cruise. But back to the appointment, the cervix seems happy. And I have gained 4 pounds. My beloved doctor told me we would listen for the heartbeat at the next appointment and that we should definitely hear it since I am "skinny." Then, in the next breath he said that I should try hard not to gain any more weight in the next 4 weeks, and at most, I can only gain 2 more pounds. He said that I am "starting at a really good point weight wise, so that helps," but that "gestational diabetes is a concern with pcos, and I've gained a bit much already. Seriously, if I didn't love this man so much, I probably would have cried. I know it seems a bit over the top, but I had been completely ok with my shape and weight gain before this. Now I feel like a cow. It feels like my pants aren't fitting because I'm a glutton. It's a good thing that more and more foods are coming back into the "safe to eat" category, because apparently I'm going to need to watch it more closely. Can anyone share stories of weight gains in the first trimester? I just don't want to feel like I'm the freak here.
The rest of the day was quite interesting. Shall we?
Vignette #1
After my exam, I headed over for some blood letting. Per my usual, I settled into a corner one seat away from the person closest to me. It seems to be the code in that waiting room, and I don't like to share leg space. Shortly after I made myself comfortable, two young women walked in. One of them was quite obviously pregnant. They were giggling and talking in that loud non-whisper and looked (and acted) about 12. Of course they chose to sit in the chairs situated at an "L" to mine directly beside me so that I had to lean my body away to avoid physical contact. Then they continued their animated whispering. (If you want to be so secret - move farther away!) I felt myself growing very annoyed with them and their attitude almost as if I were still waiting for this pregnancy. They were talking in what seemed to me to be a very naive way about the whole business. But them, my inner comments turned to chastisement as I tried to rein in those negative feelings. After all, what harm did they ever do me? And she deserved to be very happy about her coming baby.
Just as I decided that, they started discussing one of their "friends," who was "paranoid" about her chances at pregnancy and who had had "all her STD testing done already before even starting." Their tone was so scathing, it rankled me all over again. I was wishing I had brought headphones by this point. Then they said it.... "Yeah.. like I'm sure she thinks she's gonna be infertile or something." "Aaarrrgghh!!!!!!" went the angry infertile in my head as I concentrated harder on my DS. My best guess is that this poor girl already KNOWS she has problems and is going through testing because of that. Even if not, does she really deserve to be talked about in such a scathing stage whisper with strangers around? I no longer felt guilty about my annoyance.
Vignette #2
I am mercifully called in for blood letting shortly after the giggling girls have had their fun. Once again, I get the phlebotamist who is 4 months pregnant and seems to think this entitles her to offering me lots of unsolicited advice. I have not seen this woman for the 3 and a half years of very routine appointments with this office. Yet she says she's been there the whole time. Now I suddenly see her for almost every visit? How is this possible? She's the one who offered up how long she had been trying and pshawed when she asked me how long I had been so we could enter the pain olympics. (She seemed disappointed when I didn't play.)
Today her question seemed simple. "How are you feeling?" As my stomach was rumbling painfully by this point (like it does every 2 hours) I said, "Hungry all the time. Nauseous a lot." She gave me a classic cartoon double take. "HUNGRY? All the time?? How far along ARE you?" I responded that I was 9 weeks, and she said, "NINE WEEKS? So hungry at 9 weeks? What are you doing in there?" Taken aback, I replied, "Very busy growing a baby." She huffed at me, "I don't know why you so hungry at only 9 weeks! Are you sure it's only one?" I just stared. What a nice way to round up feeling like a cow for gaining 4 pounds. Lovely. Now I'm an overeating cow. To add insult to injury, she carelessly rolled my vein to the side while taking the multiple vials so she could rest her wrist. It did not feel good.
Here you can see (if you can on a computer) the lovely green we chose. Special thanks to the kind writer of We Are What We Repeatedly Do. Now we just have to finish painting the dining area... and the hallway... and the extra (baby's?) room.... sigh.Secondly, I had my first physical exam today. My girls are up a full cup size (and they ain't tiny to begin with) and my gut is bloated. In fact, dear Jen & Elizabeth advised me on a shopping trip (at which we had the best sandwiches ever made for her birthday) on buying new bras that are heaven. She also oohed with me over the cutest little maternity sundress ever that I shall wear on my upcoming cruise. But back to the appointment, the cervix seems happy. And I have gained 4 pounds. My beloved doctor told me we would listen for the heartbeat at the next appointment and that we should definitely hear it since I am "skinny." Then, in the next breath he said that I should try hard not to gain any more weight in the next 4 weeks, and at most, I can only gain 2 more pounds. He said that I am "starting at a really good point weight wise, so that helps," but that "gestational diabetes is a concern with pcos, and I've gained a bit much already. Seriously, if I didn't love this man so much, I probably would have cried. I know it seems a bit over the top, but I had been completely ok with my shape and weight gain before this. Now I feel like a cow. It feels like my pants aren't fitting because I'm a glutton. It's a good thing that more and more foods are coming back into the "safe to eat" category, because apparently I'm going to need to watch it more closely. Can anyone share stories of weight gains in the first trimester? I just don't want to feel like I'm the freak here.
The rest of the day was quite interesting. Shall we?
Vignette #1
After my exam, I headed over for some blood letting. Per my usual, I settled into a corner one seat away from the person closest to me. It seems to be the code in that waiting room, and I don't like to share leg space. Shortly after I made myself comfortable, two young women walked in. One of them was quite obviously pregnant. They were giggling and talking in that loud non-whisper and looked (and acted) about 12. Of course they chose to sit in the chairs situated at an "L" to mine directly beside me so that I had to lean my body away to avoid physical contact. Then they continued their animated whispering. (If you want to be so secret - move farther away!) I felt myself growing very annoyed with them and their attitude almost as if I were still waiting for this pregnancy. They were talking in what seemed to me to be a very naive way about the whole business. But them, my inner comments turned to chastisement as I tried to rein in those negative feelings. After all, what harm did they ever do me? And she deserved to be very happy about her coming baby.
Just as I decided that, they started discussing one of their "friends," who was "paranoid" about her chances at pregnancy and who had had "all her STD testing done already before even starting." Their tone was so scathing, it rankled me all over again. I was wishing I had brought headphones by this point. Then they said it.... "Yeah.. like I'm sure she thinks she's gonna be infertile or something." "Aaarrrgghh!!!!!!" went the angry infertile in my head as I concentrated harder on my DS. My best guess is that this poor girl already KNOWS she has problems and is going through testing because of that. Even if not, does she really deserve to be talked about in such a scathing stage whisper with strangers around? I no longer felt guilty about my annoyance.
Vignette #2
I am mercifully called in for blood letting shortly after the giggling girls have had their fun. Once again, I get the phlebotamist who is 4 months pregnant and seems to think this entitles her to offering me lots of unsolicited advice. I have not seen this woman for the 3 and a half years of very routine appointments with this office. Yet she says she's been there the whole time. Now I suddenly see her for almost every visit? How is this possible? She's the one who offered up how long she had been trying and pshawed when she asked me how long I had been so we could enter the pain olympics. (She seemed disappointed when I didn't play.)
Today her question seemed simple. "How are you feeling?" As my stomach was rumbling painfully by this point (like it does every 2 hours) I said, "Hungry all the time. Nauseous a lot." She gave me a classic cartoon double take. "HUNGRY? All the time?? How far along ARE you?" I responded that I was 9 weeks, and she said, "NINE WEEKS? So hungry at 9 weeks? What are you doing in there?" Taken aback, I replied, "Very busy growing a baby." She huffed at me, "I don't know why you so hungry at only 9 weeks! Are you sure it's only one?" I just stared. What a nice way to round up feeling like a cow for gaining 4 pounds. Lovely. Now I'm an overeating cow. To add insult to injury, she carelessly rolled my vein to the side while taking the multiple vials so she could rest her wrist. It did not feel good.
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