Introspection

Today I was reading a mildly entertaining book about a woman turning 35 who still hadn't figured out what she wanted in life and hadn't settled into her own skin. I started thinking about my own life and realized that as I've gotten older, I've relaxed more into myself. Most of the time I like who I am. My relationship fulfills me, and I feel pretty, talented and happy on my best days. I also like the values to which I've chosen to adhere and am glad I was able to figure that out before 35.

I was looking at a photo of myself recently and noticed that my face has thinned out (after only 31 years!) and that lines now bracket my mouth and eyes. My hips have widened and my hands are care-worn and strong. I decided that I like it. I finally look like a woman instead of a young girl and I like it. I can actually carry off more mature (ok, I really mean sexy) outfits now. Take that Hollywood! Some of us aren't so desperate to look like pouty lipped little ingenues! Now if only that "womanly" look didn't morph so rapidly into "elderly woman." I hope I have quite a few years to enjoy this phase.

I'm writing all this to say that at no other time in my life have I ever felt more ready to have children. I am very emotionally pleased and settled with me and with my place in my loved ones' lives. What a shame that it's so much easier to get knocked up as a teenager - the time when you couldn't be more confused about your identity.