The Quest for Happiness

Way back at the beginning, when I learned that Clomid was the cause of some awful breakdowns, I devised a helpful system. When I felt the black cloud building, I would prepare to do or be around things that make me the happiest. I would avoid everyone that I wasn't 100% comfortable with (which is most people), and hunker down with my happy thoughts. I learned the few things that could break through the madness with a bit of light.

That's still my method, but if I'm not prepared, it's much harder to overcome. When that happens, I usually get blindsided by something stupid, which makes me feel even more crappy. Then it's really hard to climb out.

I tried all the usual things the past few days. I watched favorite movies and shows, hugged my husband and pets, played a game, and even went to see a performance by the Lipizzan Stallions. It was beautiful and made me long to ride, but didn't make me forget my cares. The photo pictures the Levade.

As it happens though, I can also be blindsided into happiness. I had gone out for groceries, and decided to stop at Joanne's to get a skein of their sale yarn, and to drool at all the other things I couldn't afford.

I went to the nearest store, and was shocked to find that it was closing! ALL their items were 40-70% off the lowest marked price! They had tons of yarn left, and it was 50% off the lowest price. I rummaged, touched, gazed, pondered and rummaged again. It took me an hour to pick out my choices. They all ended up in the one to three dollar range per skein. When I came home, I laid them all out and dreamed up what they would become and in what pattern. I love the feel and beauty of good yarn. There is so much potential in that tidily wrapped package. This unexpected find bolstered my spirits for quite a few hours. I was very grateful. Now I just have to find my next nugget of happiness until I can get out of the pit.

Speaking of yarn, I promised a photo of my finished scarf. I just did knit 1, purl 1 ribbing, and I'm not entirely pleased with it, but here it is. At least it's in my favorite yarn: Lion Brand Homespun.