Top Ten for 10 Years

Today is our 10 year wedding anniversary. For our present to each other, we just took a family trip to Boston and the White Mountains of New Hampshire. It. Was. Amazing. But to celebrate today, I thought I'd make some top 10s of our life together.

Top 10 Trips Together
1. Montreal (Visa rigmarole, beautiful place)
2. Antigua (wonderful honeymoon)
3. City deal in Toronto with second city, gourmet dining and beautiful hotel)
4. Southern CA
5. Alaska (Anchorage, Denali, Seward)
6. Germany
7. The Netherlands
8. South Beach/Everglades
9. Florida Keys
10. Boston/White Mountains of NH

Top 10 Moments Together
1. Hanging out at top of CN tower
2. Walking through the door of our first house.
3. Enjoying the stillness of a beautiful wildflower valley just before Denali National Park.
4. Standing at Polychrome Pass in Denali.
5. Walking past a fragrant strawberry field in a German village
6. Reading our own vows at the altar.
7. Seeing the gorgeous blue of the Caribbean from a plane for the first time.
8. Crying together when our son was born.
9. Laughing together as we played chase with a toddler.
10. Sitting on a granite river bed amidst mountains as a family during a beautiful day.
(and oh there are so many more)

Top 10 Favorite Foods to eat together
1. Tuna noodle casserole
2. Sinigang
3. Pasta with fresh tomato sauce
4. Jen's salad
5. Palabok
6. Turkey with all the fixins
7. My shepherd's pie
8. Tacos
9. Good pizza
10. Chinese takeout.

My 10 favorite things about Hubs
1. Voice
2. Intelligence
3. Hugs
4. How he's such a loving, involved father.
5. Artistic talent & hard work
6. Dedication to what's right in the world
7. Smile
8. Loud laugh
9. Sharing my interests even when it's not his thing
10. Appreciation of culture, food, travel and wild places

Stating the Obvious

Being a good wife, mother and full time worker (especially outside in this heat) is really effing hard.


*and I have it a lot easier than a lot of Moms I know!

Help Please?

Um yeah. So I didn't get switched over to Feedly in time. (See previous post. Also, I'm a dork.) I'm currently trying to download my data from Google servers. In the meantime (and in case this proves to be too difficult for me), could you please just leave a little comment on my blog if you're still active so I can have your link? I have maybe 3 blog addresses memorized. The rest I could find through searches if they're searchable, but have pity. I'll look at you with big puppy eyes. 

Self Help is my Thing (Books)

Right now, I'm not really sure where I want this blog to go. I still have writing as a part of me, I just don't know if it's this writing. On top of that, my life is full to overflowing. And that's wonderful. It's what I want. It's just that it doesn't leave a lot of extra curricular time unless I want to be a zombie. (which I don't)

So as I figure it out, I thought I'd post a list of books that have helped me through various issues.

Infertility Struggles

1. Unsung Lullabies - There's a whole book club review of this chapter by chapter on the blog. Click on the books tag to find it.

2. A Patient's Guide to PCOS - Understanding (and reversing) Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome - This book gave me a MUCH better understanding of what I was dealing with and how much lifestyle needed to change. Highly recommend.

3. Secret Thoughts of an Adoptive Mother - This was an amazing, raw, honest book that helped me chart my course through parenthood options

4. Taking Charge of Your Fertility - To some extent. This is where I learned a lot more about fertile signs.

Special note: Navigating the Land of If by Melissa Ford is definitely one of those helpful, wonderful books. The reason it isn't in my top three is that it came along after I was past most of the situations/help provided in the book. I loved it, but I was nearing the end of my journey. It was right before my pregnancy with E, and I had come to a very calm place with a very set plan on how we would go on according to various outcomes and timelines.

The pregnancy books are well documented and known, so let's move on to parenting and its issues shall we?

Parenting a Highly Sensitive (and introverted) Child

1. The Highly Sensitive Child - this woman has many books out based on this premise. This was not only helpful for parenting, but it was helpful for understanding myself.

2. The Happiest Baby on the Block - Love this Man

3. The Happiest Toddler on the Block - I would marry him if he asked. Seriously... if you don't like some of the "touchy/feely" language, please plow on. Wonderful gems in here.

4. Quiet - The Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking - Amazingly scientific study based and fascinating. Delves much more deeply into the science of what the Highly Sensitive Child discusses.

5. Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems (the newest edition) - Jen let me borrow hers. I really need to give it back. (sorry Jen!) If you use it, read as much as you can. You may be missing important bits if you don't. For example, God bless Ferber for backing us up on what we already figured. E's problems with sleep often have an anxiety component and progressive leaving (which we had done) only makes it worse (which we've seen.) He has other ways of dealing with anxiety issues. Love, love, love this.

And Best Books for Taking me Away

1. Anything by Robin McKinley. You should love her too.

2. Harry Potter series - Duh

3.Twilight series - Duh again. I don't care if it's not great literature. It was great story telling.

4. Graceling series - This is a new one for me. I'm really digging it so far. 

5. Outlander series 

6. Ender's Game

7. Lord of the Rings 

Oh three. You are indeed interesting.

E & E

When Jen told me she was going to visit, she asked what present she could bring Ewan. I told her nothing, but she insisted, so I asked E what he'd like. When given that broad, open question, E chose a Superman shirt. Jen found a fabulous one with a cape and a hat to go with it. (He ADORES hats.)

She gave it to Dibits to give to E. he was clearly star struck but wouldn't put it on while they were here. When Daddy got home, he wore it and carried out all his superhero duties (like helping us find things and posing heroically and only answering to the name "Superman.")

Superman is currently asleep in uniform with his cape draped near the bed for any emergency superhero needs.

Stars Because I Don't Have Bullets on Mobile

*The most important update: The good thoughts, prayers, vibes must be working because after a second surgery, things are looking much better. Will be really out of the woods in 48 hours.

*THANK YOU

*Our trip to the beach and Jen's visit to our house could not have come at a better time for my sanity.

*In related news, I highly recommend Pass-a-Grille and Ft. Desoto's North Beach.

*In more related news, I also highly recommend friends who feel like big comfy chairs by a fire... With hot chocolate. (Jen I'm calling you a chair! Hehe)

*And their yummy, squishy babies and cute girls.

Prayers needed

The surgery initially went well, but now many complications have arisen. Please send all you've got.

Overwhelmed

Today is one of those days when I'm feeling overwhelmed by everything that I have and want to do including blog posts. We had an amazing, busy day yesterday and now the fallout... I keep telling myself that if I can swing part time work next August, that things will be easier. Please keep telling me that's true. My house is a disaster. I can't find anything. I need to go to the store because a few critical things are at a very low level. Bills need to be paid. Presents need to be purchased. I'm missing many friend and family events. The old TV needs to be moved out. I'm pooped. E wants me to play constantly and is snotty and breaking out in hives because of allergies constantly AND I really just want to sit on a porch swing (which we don't have) with a drink in my hand. Whining out. 

Surgery

Someone very close to me is going in for heart surgery tomorrow. Please send thoughts for speedy healing.

Violence

I just found out today from a neighbor (and verified on our County Sheriff's site) that there was a mugging at gunpoint in our neighborhood. And it was not only in our neighborhood, it was right around our clubhouse. Those are the very roads that E and I run, walk and play around many of our weekends. Our area is generally very safe for one so close to the city, but there's nothing like a national scare and one right next door shortly after to make me want to hide in the house.

The crazy thing is, the guy held up a lady with a baby in a stroller... Because we often have vast riches when we're out for a walk? It makes me sad to think he might have stolen her wedding ring. I know she gave him a phone and iPod, and he sped off.

I want it to get better, but I'm afraid it won't.

Happy Earth Day!

To celebrate Earth Day, I thought I'd talk about those by now famous 3 R's; reducing, reusing and recycling. And note that if you follow Here We Go Again, she's pretty darn good at this stuff. I struggle a little more because of the time and the tired.

Reducing is the most "duh" of the three I think. It is the most "green" of the three as it eliminates even the energy needed to make or reuse the product in the first place, but it's not always as easy as it sounds. We're so accustomed to what we have and the packaging that comes with it that it can be hard to find alternatives. One of my favorite things we've done to reduce is that we've slowly been replacing all of our electronics and light bulbs with Energy Star certified products and compact fluorescent bulbs. Note though that proper disposal of CFLs is important. They contain mercury that can leach into the ground if not recycled or disposed of properly. Some states even contain laws against them ending up in landfills. Furthermore, virtually all of the components of CFLs can be recycled for use in other areas.

Reusing can be a lot of fun. Remember all those tire flower beds in the 80's and 90's? Okay, so some of this stuff isn't for everyone, but my favorite re-use we've done is the pet cage turned into a strawberry bed, a wall shelf turned into a shoe rack, and the cloth diapering. I've heard so many people refer to the water used to wash cloth diapers as just as much waste as making disposables, but they aren't taking into account all the water, energy and gas used in the marketing, production, packaging, transport and sale of disposables. (Not that I'm judging which one you choose - see the Hill to Die On post. ;-) I just don't like that myth being bandied about.) And I much prefer cloth napkins. They are so much easier to use, so much prettier and they're so tiny that it really adds nothing to a load of laundry.

As for recycling, this is where all that stuff falls that couldn't be taken care of in the first two categories. You have your home recycling. For example, newspapers used as pet cage liners. And you have your curbside recycling which is actually mandated in many counties. There are lots of arguments for recycling various materials, but I'll choose one of the easiest and most successful - the aluminum can. Read this for lots of cool information as to why it's helpful to recycle aluminum, but one of my favorites gets a lot of people who love wildlife. They say, "How am I helping an animal really by recycling? There's no impact." However, to that I say that we use a mineral called bauxite to make aluminum. Bauxite is found most abundantly in tropical and sub-tropical areas - including rainforests. Strip mining is the method used to obtain the mineral. Thus habitat destruction is a pretty big given in any bauxite mined area. When we recycle aluminum, we don't have to mine bauxite for that particular can etc. meaning you might have helped to save just one more bit of rainforest for a little longer. It also goes without saying that recycling aluminum is cheaper, more energy efficient and uses less water (also a finite resource) than creating new. It's very recyclable and most of our soda cans are made using recycled aluminum. 

And lastly, don't forget to support these endeavors! My recycled paper toilet paper (White Cloud makes a good one!) and from recycled products aluminum foil (Reynold's is my go-to) is cheaper than the competitors. And if we can support sustainable farming and products that benefit a local population, we're killing quite a few birds with one stone. Shade grown coffee is a good idea, but understand what you're buying first. Eco-mochilas (bags) make great, interesting gifts and are a product that helps people and animals!

Whatever your favorite Earth related activity, I hope you get outside and enjoy yourself regularly. It's a pretty beautiful world out there.

Your Hill to Die On

We are all familiar with "mommy wars" by now. It's been blogged, talked and written about over and over. One of the things I've encountered frequently is the firmly stated assertion that someone WILL not and that I or you MUST NOT be making more than ONE MEAL AT DINNER TIME! 

To that I say, we all have our hills we're willing to die on. And you know what? That is not one of mine. If that makes you horribly upset or sad then I'm sorry for you. I could care less if that's the way you want to run your household. I know (and have heard aplenty) that there are numerous pros to sticking to your guns with one specific menu at each meal time, including the "I am not a short order cook" explanation. That's fabulous. You know what? I think I'd like to be a short order cook. I'm darn near a vegetarian. I'll eat particular chicken breast, a little turkey breast and the occasional very specific fish. Eggs are good IN things, not always on my plate. It's the way I am for many reasons and one of them is that I just don't like meat. My husband is a ravenous carnivore. He likes nothing better than a giant slab of steak with a tiny side of potatoes and vegetables. I like nothing better than a delicious salad with every veggie in it I can find. E is somewhere between the two of us. He's not so into beef, but he's currently in the toddler stage of chicken nuggets, hot dogs and french fries, YUM. (while I secretly gag.) 

My husband also does not have any of the blood lipid level issues I do, and while he's come a very long way toward healthier eating with me and is always game to try something new, I don't expect that he needs to limit himself to the extremes I do. 

Therefore, it's my and my family's pleasure to sometimes find what we'll all eat. I enjoy the juggling. After work when we're all home by 7 if we're lucky, we sometimes all eat some different form of quick cook meal. It's common for me to have a salad or sandwich, Hub to have a Stouffer's meal and E to have some sort of Gerber Graduate thing. Yup - horrible Mom here. I obviously don't care about my family right?

But seriously, we're not raising an ungrateful brat, I promise. Most people we meet seem to think he's a pretty gracious and polite child. And this is just not one of my parenting hills to die on. I plan on tightening it up some when he gets older, but I still will never force him to eat things he hates. He needs to TRY things he doesn't know well, but he doesn't have to finish a plateful of it. My mother never made me do that, and I grew from the typical picky eater child into an adult who will try almost any vegetable dish out there. Meat is simply my sticking point, and that's ok. 

So, I have my hills, but not too many I'd die on. I just can't afford (due to my personality and lifestyle) to go to that level of devotion. What's most important to me are manners, exposure to a wide variety of interests, ethnicities and world views and an appreciation for the outdoors and exercise. The rest? We'll figure it out I promise. Do you have a Hill to Die On?

Good PCOS Food

I found another healthy and delicious breakfast that keeps my energy up and pleases my palate! It's very simple.

I mix some Dannon low fat plain yogurt*, Publix Greenwise vanilla flavored protein powder (about the equivalent to how much they say to put in a drink of the same size), frozen blueberries and a dash of agave nectar. Just mix it all to your individual taste. It is scrumptious. 

I always love to share a good food find. 

*Not all plain yogurts are created equal. I find Dannon to be a delicious one. Stoneyfield Farms is good too, but it's harder to find and much more expensive.

The Money Saving

You'll all be happy to know I bought the stove! And I'm happy I did it when I did because it is now on clearance for $32 more than what I bought it for, and our local Lowe's is out of stock.

Now we just have to keep an eye out for good deals on an interesting travel destination for our anniversary. We're thinking somewhere cooler US or Canada since it will be in August. If anyone sees a good deal, send it my way!

The Simple Humanity

Jen's post, "The Good" inspired me to write my own post about happiness and simple humanity in our daily lives. It can be easy to get bogged down in the scary awful that seems to happen all too often these days. So though E and I didn't practice Jen's philanthropy yesterday, we did have a lovely day filled with lovely human interaction, and I thought I'd share.

In the morning, we awoke to hugs and kisses from Daddy before he left for work. Then E waved to him until he couldn't see him anymore, and we checked on our strawberry garden to supplement breakfast. After that I did a little laundry, and E noticed his swimming trunks which sparked an interest in the pool. We packed up and walked to our clubhouse. Once there we met 2 other families with children E's age along with what E called "Grandmas." The kids conversed and played, and the adults helped watch/entertain all children and shared supplies. Everyone was gentle, congenial and kind. 

Afterward we walked back to the house where E played quietly while I cooked homemade pasta sauce (yes, the yummy tasty kitchen onion/butter kind.) Then Hub came home, and we all sat pleasantly around the table, discussed a little of the unpleasant and gave out lots of hugs. Before bed, we all danced around the living room to E's favorite music.

How Should I Spend My Money? You Weigh In.

Hey folks. I have an indecision issue. I have some extra money in my checking account I got from some health incentives and holiday pay that I was saving for a new range. However, I had to use a portion of it to buy a new vacuum cleaner when mine died completely. (My Shark. I love it!) So now I have a slightly smaller portion, making getting what I want a little more difficult.

Here's the dilemma. I've found this stove on sale for $551. This is the cheapest I've ever seen a reputable brand with the features I want, and the sale ends this week. Those features are a larger than 4.2 cubic foot, self-cleaning oven, smooth-top and stainless steel. I would go for black if I had to, but I really think the stainless would look best in our slowly being remodeled kitchen. It comes with free delivery and haul-away, but you have to buy the electrical cord.

The reason we need a new stove: Ours is a 1982 harvest gold colored model that guzzles electricity, has some questionable burners and one small hairline crack in the oven glass. It no longer self cleans, and the locking oven door knob has fallen completely off. It's the last appliance in the kitchen that needs to be replaced.

The problem here is that we could use the money toward other things. The other options that need to be seen to...

Our 10 year anniversary trip: We have some money put back for this, and I do get two more holiday pays before we go, but at the same time, we've decided to add E to the trip, making it much more expensive.

Guest bath vanity: It's the original particle and compressed wood model. The paint is bubbling, and the "wood" is warping. The coating on the sink is wearing off, and the sink itself has rust spots around the upper drain. I'd like to replace it, but also want to pay someone to install the new one, since it involves plumbing.

Master shower: the Master shower walls still need to be replaced because of water damage behind the tile. This has been a need since we bought the house. We currently only use the tub. However, this is a LARGE expense, so this amount of money would just be saving toward it.

The first three are the ones I'm leaning toward, but what would YOU spend the money on? 

Donut Jelly Beans

In case you were wondering what they're called.

From the Mouth of E

E: I'm singing a song Mommy! Want to sing it too?
Me: Sure! How does it go?
E: random song with the words "round up" sprinkled throughout.
E: Want to watch the song Mommy?
Me: Sure. Is it on the Kindle?
E: No. It's on the DVD player in my mouth!

Strawberries