Seven Months Photo

You all have convinced me you won't be horrified, so I'm posting my 7 mos photo. It's just so different from even 2 weeks ago!

Seven Months!

Oh my goodness gracious, this is really going to happen! We're so close now, and I'm starting to feel frantic about getting things done! Once his nursery is in place, and we have a better grip on where the hospital is etc, I think I'll feel better. I may have to take up some people on their offers of help. For those of you I know who may wonder why I've been turning down social engagements... well this is part of it. I feel like I need every weekend to get this stuff done. And Hub is always so busy, I just get snippets of his time. OK. If I don't stop, I'll work myself into a tizzy.

So to honor the seven months, I have a moment I'd like to always remember from the little one.

When I hunker down to do something, the babybutt often starts rumbling around a little. Then he taps me lightly a few times.. then a few times more. I always feel like he's saying in a sweet little voice, "Um. Mom? Excuse me. Excuse me? But I'm feeling a little scrunched in here. Have you noticed? Hello?" Then the taps will become a little harder and a little more frequent. "OK Mom. Seriously. This isn't comfortable. Do you think you could maybe move?" Then there are a few actual pops and rolls. "All right. I'm sorry to say this, but if you don't move soon, I'm going to have to be a bit more insistent. I mean it!" And then finally come the kicks and rolls that startle an "OOF!" out of me. It really cracks me up every time I feel it and imagine the little scenario in my head. I don't do it on purpose. Sometimes I have to be hunkered like I am for a particular task. But man does he not appreciate that. As I've said before, that is just NOT acceptable.

And here are some nice Hub quotes from last night:

"I love your pregnant belly!"
"I missed you so so so much!"
"I can't wait to meet the baby. He's going to be so cute!"
(In response to my discomfort when getting in bed...) "Aaaaaw. Baby. I'm sorry."

Photo to come, but I feel like I look enormous in it. And even though the doctor declares me right on target, I'm starting to feel a bit insecure from all the "You're enormous!" comments. It makes me hesitant to post photos.

Your Ideas, Thoughts, Help?

OK. I need help again. Sleeping is becoming a not fun exercise. The sciatica is getting worse on the right side and moving up into my lower back. My belly is uncomfortable much of the time too. And even when I get those things situated, then my neck hurts. Does anyone have any recommendations, ideas, etc for sleeping better? I have lots of pillows, a body pillow, a foam thingy on the bed and a pregnancy wedge which I find too hard for under my belly. I personally favor the sleeping for a while, getting up and then going back to sleep later, but that doesn't work so well when you're working...

Grateful

I've been feeling pretty good the past few days. And babybutt is a crazy crazy little man. I'm grateful for that! I'm also deciding to post how I'm grateful for my husband. See the why here at Jen's.

Today I'm grateful for the fact that Hub has been so nice every time I talk to him on the phone about what his family is up to. I'm grateful that he seems appreciative and grateful for what I'm doing now and have done for our home. I'll have better ones as soon as I see him more, I'm sure.

Emotional

I would like to blog about how I went to an Aveda open house and got a free 5 minute massage, a hand scrub and massage, make-up consult and some yummy finger food. I would also like to blog about how nice it is to have a good friend with which to do that, and how I booked a hair AND massage appointment with the wonderful massage therapist I met there.

That's what I would like to feel like talking about. Instead, I'm so focused on negative shit. I find myself so very sensitive to criticism lately. It's been difficult. Sometimes even the slightest criticism makes me want sit in my room and mope. The crying is frequent. Yes I am normally an emotional girl, but this is ridiculous. Negative comments, no matter how nicely worded, on the condition of my house, my looks, my hair (of course happened at the salon), my thoughts, my husband... all of it either makes me anxious or depressed. One of the big triggers right now is I've just grown out of a bunch more clothes and am not looking nice again in the wardrobe department. It's especially bad if I think I've made a lot of progress in one area or another and then someone casually comments on how bad it is. Then it's so much worse because I was proud of myself. What the Hell? I know it's hormones, but it's still so difficult. I'm seriously thinking of just becoming a hermit for the rest of this pregnancy. Or at the very least, I'm considering not having most people over to the house ever again.... unless perhaps they sign a contract that only permits them to say shiny happy things while here. I was always self conscious about the condition of my house in a cleanliness sense and in a "it's not finished" sense, but it's gotten a million times worse now. I'm so insecure about the fact that it's not yet in any way a finished product. But at the same time, we've just gotten the money to start doing that stuff, and it really is coming along! AAAAAAAAAHH.

All of this, and the in-laws are coming tomorrow. And I will be alone with them a lot. And MIL has promised to "get information" from me on Hub that he won't give to her. And yes again, this is the same MIL who said my arms and face were looking fat, not just pregnant.* Internets - please be nice to me the next few days... or maybe weeks... or months?

*Amongst many other issues on which I'm sure she'll have more commentary.

Kermit Had it Right

In an emergency run for allergy medication for Hub:

A Wal-Mart cashier goes to put my 3 items - a bag of chips and two small bottles of medicine - in one of those annoying plastic bags.

Me: Oh, don't worry. I don't need a bag. I'll just carry them.

Her (still putting them in the bag): Are you sure? You need one.

Me: No I don't. I'll just put these in my purse and carry the chips.

Her: But they like you to have a bag!

Me: I'm sorry. I'll just tell them I told you not to give me one if they ask. (I never asked who "they" were.)

Her: But they might ask for proof when you exit!

Me: Yes. That's ok. I'll just show them.

Her: But they'll ask for your receipt I mean!

Me: Yes. That's what I'll show them. I'm ok with that.

Her: Are you SURE?

Me (exasperated but calm look): I'm SURE. These bags are a waste.

Her: No! They can be so useful!

At that point I cut eye contact and moved quickly away. These are the same people that often also look at me like I'm crazy when I have my own bags and then get all huffy about not wanting to pack them and watch me while I do so. Whatever. Sometimes we're so backward here. By the way - "they" didn't want to see my receipt even when I offered.

Climbing that Hill...

I am now 32 years old. What a sobering thought! I'm quite glad I'm this young, but at the same time, I'm bothered that I'm this old. Does that make any sense?

In any case, I had a lovely birthday. Hub bought me some beautiful gifts including a prenatal massage! WOOOOOOOO! I could really use that now seeing as my back, shoulders, neck, feet and calves are really starting to feel it. I don't know if it will help the sciatica or not, but that would be a bonus!

I got other wonderful gifts too and had delicious food. Then Hub spent most of the night with me instead of working. I told him that was his plan all along. He just wanted to get me used to not spending much time with him so that I'd be so grateful when he could that it would seem extra special and would be an easy Barb pleaser! Half kidding.

The only downside to the food thing? Apparently the nausea is back. It's not really as bad as the first trimester nausea, but I have that same sour taste in my mouth, and food doesn't taste quite right or quite satisfy. It fills the angry gaping void that is my stomach, but the type of thing I eat is quite important to my feeling of well being afterward. On top of that, there isn't much room in there anymore, and eating is getting more difficult. Babybutt likes to kick the heck out of that area as well. Lots going on in the gastronomical world of Barb!